Why do human beings verbally attack opponents with ferocity; what is the psychology of such anger or abuse?
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Origin of this question?
Today on hubpages I read two obvious attacks on character and several other covert comments, dripping with judgment. The direct hits include:
1. A demeaning attack on a spiritual woman who described her personal faith experience.
2. A demeaning attack on a group of "liberal commie faggots" for defending a church.
I did not feel attacked.
I did not feel like attacking.
I read these vicious words
with the weight of
astonishment
I am not immune to the
sensation of anger,
of cells colliding within me,
cutting off blood to my brain.
But here
I was an observer.
And I wondered.
Why do human beings attack those who support different sports teams, political personalities or agendas, religious beliefs?
And why do we believe we have the right to attack those who disagree with us?
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Caveman mentality?
Perhaps such behavior relates to instincts required for survival, when our forefathers lived in caves? Those of you who read Michner's Centennial might recall how tribes running into unknown two leggeds did not see this "other" as like beings. Non-relatives were initially considered animals.
Both sides reacted this way. Both sides instinctively felt fear. Both sides killed.
Verbal abuse is a form of killing.
A similar concept?
The attacker in both instances was not focused on a breathing human being with desires and needs, but rather on an (often faulty) idea of the person or group, such as:
1. Believing in a spirit world is stupid. This person expresses her faith, therefore she is stupid.
2. Liberals do not believe in God. How can they support a church?
Such thoughts are justified by rationalization:
1. My opinion matters more than some dumb person who believes in the spirit world.
2. My opinion matters more than a commie liberal who does not believe in God.
And the attacker arrives at this conclusion:
1. It is my job to tell this person who believes in the spirit world that she is dumb.
2. It is my job to tell this group of people who do not believe in God that they are hypocrites.
Evidence seems to suggest humans have an aversion to attacking their fellow man. See the article below, titled The Psychology of Killing. Transforming the recipient into a symbol changes from something personal to something anonymous. Dehumanizing the enemy prepares the field for maiming.
Distancing one's self from the enemy through technology has similar effect. Listen to the video and see how that is accomplished!
- The Psychology of Killing and the Origins of War | smellslikescience.com
Has warfare been handed down to us through millions of years of evolution? Is it part of who we are as a species? - Small-scale killing is human nature, but massive slaughter requires states « David McElro
Christmas truce of 1914 cited as proof.
Emotional abuse quiz
- Emotional Abuse Quiz
The Emotional Abuse Quiz will tell you if you are walking on eggshells to avoid emotional abuse and verbal abuse.
Or maybe it isn't about the victim at all!
Critical people tend to also be critical of themselves, writes Steven Stosny of Psychology Today.
They believe they are never good enough and constantly second guess their value in the world. When very young, they express this accurately, but questioning self worth transforms into criticizing others- particularly during adolescence and as adults.
In other words, what the speakers are saying about "their victim" reveals issues inside themselves. The attackers turn the unfortunate person or group into a symbol of their insecurities: an incidental victim.
For example, the first person might actually be saying, The unknown scares me; I will attack anyone who makes me even think about it.
Or the second might be saying, If a liberal believes in God, my whole reason for believing I am more special and more right disappears.
- Verbal Abuse & Adult Psychological Problems | World of Psychology
Many psychotherapists trace the source of adult psychological problems to difficulties in childhood and treatment from parents. Family systems therapists frame
Breaking it down changes my perspective.
Examining this, I re-evaluate my initial response. Now I am curious to read hubs by these attackers to see whether my research has validity. I am curious to hear your thoughts and personal experiences related to such brainstorming.
What do you think?
Why do you think a person verbally attacks another?
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Hey Story. I apologize for being away so long... :-) You raise a question I am very interested in here. Why are some people so insensitive in their remarks? In the poll I answered the combination of attaacking the idea and also the self-loathing. I might prefer to say lacking self confidence but that is probably the same thing as self-loathing when you get down to it.
I actually think its a very simple thing (as opposed to FIS) however what he says is right on. Why do we take things so personally? What I wonder is why we (in general) allow perfect or almost perfect strangers to insult us so??? These people don't know us. Why would a stranger's baseless remark injure a confident adult? I suppose its primarily due to a lack experience in such situations. But why can't we FIRST assume there is a lack of understanding on the commenter's part and then if clarification determines that a bit of commentary on our work/beliefs/person is found to be an attack why not take it as either something to shake your head at as if made by an immature individual OR as something overly harsh and unintended OR as a combination of the two. I don't believe that well intentioned people will mean to make insulting comments on these pages. The good ones who make constructive counterpoints like the Old Poolman and yes even that dude that needs to put on Pants (JUST to name a couple! - I know more of you guys) are the ones we should be more like.
I think the bigger point for some might be that one probably doesn't KNOW someone making "mean" comments from these pages well (you'll have to define knowing someone well for yourself) and therefore why would you let their comments injure you so deeply? In general your family and friends are the people you really trust. Normally only comments from a person I know and trust can really actually emotionally hurt me for very long. Seems simple. NOT that I blame those with thin skins. :-) I get riled up myself when I see things that seem outrageously mean or uncalled for. But you know. You gotta take some things with a grain of salt.
That's my opinion! :-)
Hawkesdream, I appreciate this so much and look forward to what you have to say!
This is a very thought provoking hub. I answered in the poll with ' I think it is something completely different' and I stand by that. The thing is, I am not sure what at the present time. I will come back and give you my thoughts.
Genna, thanks so much for your excellent comment. I understand the desire to police this activity but am certain this would result in cries of censorship. (Sorry for the upcoming type-os, I cannot scroll down to fix them.)
Yet it is nearly impossible to have an especially political discussion here. Points in hubs are ignored and readers hop right into rants. I am removing my political hubs today because of this. It's not worth the loss of sleep.
As much as I appreciate our system and cannot imagine another, the consrant divisiveness every two years or more has me questioning its wisdom. We have all entrenched and it's disintegrated unto another civil war.
I have to agree with Sunnie's thoughtful comment. This has troubled me for some time. We also witness such attacks throughout the internet; on television "news" programs that have been inundated with opinions of commentators, and so forth. We have learned about terribly bullying by children in our public school systems…sadly this type of behavior seems to permeate our society more and more.
We cannot, as a society, allow this type of behavior to continue without standing up, so to speak, as you have here. We each have opinions, our own faiths and our own political views. But these can be heard with an open mind and respect without acting like unruly and crude juvenile delinquents.
Perhaps Hubpages should step in and disallow this type of hub bullying…it is a shame that such behavior needs to be policed…especially in this kind of environment.
Excellent hub!
FIS, I agree these issues are complex! I suppose that is why some people dedicate their careers to the study of human behavior. I find it fascinating- when I am in the peanut gallery.
Fe, theory and practice are such different realities. Nice to sit at home and explore it all. But life in groups and families and offices provide theory testing ground, I guess.
Thank you both for your thoughtful comments.
'Live and let live' is an axiom we'd all do well to emulate. Alas, reality is so different...our insecurities surface in different ways, and attacking others with or without provocation seems to be at the top of the list.
I think this issue is more complex than can be gotten at here... but.. two things I would add, The first: our thoughts, ideas, emotions are all intimate to us, a part of us, those who disagree with them hurt us as much as if they were insulting us or insulting our children. Plus, people who disagree with us cause us to question our own identity, meaning only those who are very secure in themselves or who like to have a fairly fluid identity are likely to take it well. Secondly, I've seen a few studies that suggest that the relative anonymity of the internet.. the fact that we can't actually see the other person's hurt reaction, emboldens us to be meaner, more violent... no physical presence, less chance of empathy kicking in.
Bob
Good points. Thanks, Sunnie Day.
I have to say I have not had too many of these things happen personaly but I have sat back and observed it happening to others which hurt me for them. I do think it does cause us to keep some restraint and that is not a bad thing.Just because we think it does not mean we have to write it. When I referred to cyber bullying I meant it sometimes feels as if some are attacked pretty strongly but hopefully they are strong enough to keep writing.Thanks again..of course there is always the delete button and why carry on a fight on hub that leads to only bad feelings.
Sunnie
anndavis25, sad commentary!
Sunnie Day, I am sorry you have had this experience, i.e., cyber bullying at hubpages. Probably most of us have... and some seem to thrive on such conversations.
I stopped writing about my dogs because of an extemely hurtful remark made by someone I had offended by writing a short comment on one of her hubs. I have a thin skin, though I am getting better about such things.
I have stopped writing about politics more times than I can count, because the response has often been beyond cruel. And I have a hard time forgetting who said what. I always seem to try again, but too often wish I had not.
The positive part of all this is that I have learned a bit of restraint and discovered new perspectives. And the biggest positive for me is that I was encouraged to write poetry by the one and only Hub Poet Laureate Tom.
I hear you loud and clear. I would encourage you to keep writing, because writing frequently- especially daily- improves your ability to communicate your thoughts and to gain confidence.
This has been the one thing that has made me at times want to leave hubs. It is hard not to read the comments as it tends to be human nature but I should just avoid them too. I thought hub was about writing and analyzing the technique with honest feedback not vicious attacks about someone’s belief system or thoughts. If I am wrong then maybe I joined with the wrong impression. I thought this was a place to grow as writers, to encourage one another and yes forming friendships but not a place to verbal abuse others. Sometimes it reminds me of cyber bullying. I hate to say that but I have read some horrible hub bashing. If one wants to write about their faith, their political views so be it but it should not be a battle and cause fear in others to post anything. That is where the bullying comes in. Maybe the questions should be deleted from hubs. I am just saying. It seems that is where the heated debates start. I do not see any value in them but you get points for the more questions you ask and answer. Just my thoughts. Thanks for a great hub!
Collective madness!
Storytellersrus Hub Author 4 weeks ago
Lapse, thank you for your thoughts and experience!
I have been very busy with family matters and lapsed longer than you, in fact- I apologize for taking this long to read your comment.